The Me I Used to Be by Kristan Higgins: A Heartfelt Book Review About Friendship, Loss and Second Chances

The Me I Used to Be is a deeply moving story of friendship, loss, dementia and the bonds that endure through life’s changes.

Acknowledgments:

Thank you to the author for graciously providing me with an ARC of the audiobook. The thoughts and opinions expressed here are my own.

Summary:

At their twenty-fifth high school reunion, former best friends Audrey, Micah, Jasmine, and Beck reunite after decades apart, forced to confront how far their lives have drifted from the dreams they once carefully planned together. Known in high school as the “Core Four,” their tight bond fractured after a tragic accident on graduation night, leaving unresolved hurt and silence that lingered for years. Now adults facing stalled careers, complicated relationships, outspoken children, and long-buried secrets, the reunion becomes especially urgent when one of them receives a diagnosis of early-onset dementia. Over the course of one emotional weekend, the friends must reckon with their shared past, rediscover the meaning of loyalty and forgiveness, and decide whether their friendship still has the power to reshape their futures.

My Thoughts:

Kristan Higgins is an auto-read author for me. Her books are filled with wonderfully developed characters and deeply meaningful emotional stories that tend to stay with me long after I’ve finished reading. The Me I Used to Be is no exception—and I think it may be my favourite of hers.

During their senior year of high school, Audrey, Micah, Jasmine and Beck were inseparable. Nicknamed the “Core Four,” they were the lucky one, the beautiful one, the smart one and the sporty one, and they were certain their friendship would last a lifetime. But graduation night ended in tragedy, and the four women went their separate ways, leaving decades of silence between them.

When they reunite at their twenty-fifth high school reunion, they discover that life hasn’t unfolded quite as they imagined it would. There are complicated marriages, stalled careers, adult children and, of course, secrets that have been carried for far too long. Their reunion becomes even more poignant when one of the women is facing a diagnosis of early-onset dementia, making their time together all the more precious.

I loved the way Higgins gradually reveals the depth and history of the Core Four’s friendship through memories and moments in the present. There is something incredibly special about friendships that can withstand the passage of time, even when life, mistakes and circumstances get in the way. We should all be so lucky to experience relationships as meaningful and enduring as these women share.

Higgins writes all four characters with such compassion, respect and kindness, but I felt particularly connected to the woman living with dementia. I have seen a loved one progress through this devastating disease and have learned first-hand just how heartbreaking it can be. I cannot imagine being in my early forties and receiving such a diagnosis—or watching someone I love face it at that age. The intimacy and thoughtfulness with which Higgins portrays this experience is, to me, a work of art. It is a storyline that I will remember for a very long time.

The Narration:

I listened to The Me I Used to Be as an audiobook, narrated by an ensemble cast, and the performances were fantastic. Xe Sands gives a standout performance as Audrey, bringing such depth and emotion to the character that I can’t imagine anyone else giving her a voice. If you enjoy audiobooks, I highly recommend experiencing this story in that format.

Final Thoughts:

Beautiful, emotional and deeply human, The Me I Used to Be is a story about family, friendship, loss, forgiveness and the complicated ways our past continues to shape who we become. It touched my heart in a way few books do, and I know this is one I’ll remember for years to come.